Strange? Wild?

Posted by on Aug 27, 2009 in Lounging Around | 22 comments

Just came across this on Lounger Nigel Francis‘ web site:

“I found the Sheffield Magic Shop (�Magick Enterprises�) in a tiny unit on Howard Street. There was a very strange man behind the counter with wild frizzy hair and a beard called Russell.”

Actually, I’m called Russell. Haven’t got around to naming my beard yet. Very remiss of me I’m sure. Always open to helpful suggestions though…


  1. Strange man?! A bit harsh Russ, but fancy naming your beard, very egotistical!

    • “Strange” I may have reluctantly accepted; perceptions are unavoidably filtered through our preconceptions after all. It was the “very” that wounded.

    • Some people have said I’m egotistical… but that’s enough about them.

      • Fantastic one liner! That get the Bell seal of approval….

  2. Having a named beard would be a bit much.

    Even the likes of Eugene Burger and Kenton Knepper don’t have names for their beards.

    Maybe you could start a trend.

    You could call it “Colin”

    • What proof do you have of your wild claims that these eminent persons have failed to name their hirsute appendages?

      Quite like “Colin”… you don’t think it might be a bit tweed jacket though?

      Perhaps something with a little more je ne sais quoi?

  3. I can see it now……the think of a name for Russell’s beard competition…..oh it could be a winner!

  4. How about “Wizardo” (said with a slight Italian accent) for the beard’s name?

    Hope the ‘ is in the correct place!


    • Ben Hur (said with a slight Liverpool accent)?

      Apostrophes never less than apposite.

  5. Nycteris commented via Twitter: “That post made me laugh out loud! So if you name a beard, does a moustache have a separate name?”

    Hmm, do you think that might be going a bit too far?

    Though I do remember a girlfriend once telling me that a kiss without a moustache is like an egg without salt… or was it a fish without an ironing board…? No, it was definitely a girlfriend.

  6. OK. If no one else is going to say it, I will…

    Do you think I should cut it short and call it Sean?

    • Shorn?

      • Ah, nothing gets past you, Adam!

  7. Tarquin… surely!!??!!

  8. I accept that I cannot prove that Messers Burger and Knepper have not named their beards. If they are readers of this blog I am sure they could let us know.

    On a more important point, it’s a sad thing indeed, that the most discussion we have had on Russell’s excellent blog, is over the name of his beard!!! its a sad world word we live in we should be ashamed.


  9. Well I will be honest Russ, I had to think about it for a while before the penny dropped! Was, as ever, very subtle!

    • If you’re going to be subtle, be bold; that’s my advice.

  10. Let me know what name you choose, need adding to my Xmas card list.

  11. Personnally I prefer “Slartibartfast”

    Though as the man himself said “my name is not important” so probably not worth mentioning … sorry.

    • Always worth mentioning someone with such a deep understanding of the world and its fiddly bits. I quote:

      Slartibartfast: Perhaps I’m old and tired, but I think that the chances of finding out what’s actually going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say, “Hang the sense of it,” and keep yourself busy. I’d much rather be happy than right any day.

      Arthur Dent: And are you?

      Slartibartfast: Ah, no. [laughs] Well, that’s where it all falls down, of course.


      Arthur: All my life I’ve had this strange feeling that there’s something big and sinister going on in the world.

      Slartibartfast: No, that’s perfectly normal paranoia. Everyone in the universe gets that.

  12. I love this! Name Russell’s beard, what a marvelous idea.

    How about, Soup-Saver or Chilly Cheeks?

    By the way:

    Q: Why did the magician grow a beard?
    A: So that no one could call him a bare-faced liar.

    Looking forward to seeing you all in October!


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